What a difference a year makes...

I had some down time today so I decided to go back and read my blogs. I am amazed at the things I wrote about Lesli and me and how I felt last year. Everything I wrote about her and how wonderful she is is true. In many ways she is the most amazing person I know.

Something happened in the last year to change the dynamic in our relationship. After being many people's version of the ideal couple for so long, something changed. We went from being truly happy with everything the other person did to not feeling appreciated, respected or loved. I don't know why it changed or how it changed. It just did. I swear if I could pinpoint what it was that changed, or how to fix it I would.

She was my everything, and I hers! How can you go from that situation to being separated in different states with no plan to get back together??? I wish I knew! We text regularly, and talk from time to time. She says that she is happy and is happy not to feel the pain she has been going through. I tell her I miss her.

She is in Utah being grandma and being with her kids and loving it. I am here going through the motions and missing her. I know it was my decision that put us in this position, so I have no one to blame but myself for that. That doesn't mean I have to like it, and I don't.

I just want to say that I am sorry to all of the ladies who know and love Lesli and who miss her, or will miss her. I know she is coming back to teach her classes each month, but it is not the same. I know my decision is what caused her to look at moving back to Utah to be closer to her grandkids and kids. The only reason she stayed in Arizona for so long is because I like it here and don't want to move to Utah for various reasons. Otherwise, she would have moved sooner so you can thank me for that.

Be sure to get your Lesli fix when she comes each month to keep you going until the next month because we all miss her.